Like really stinking weird. okay so I’ll just get to it:
The setting was when I was 20 and I was actually with my ex boyfriend again(or still who freaking knows in a dream) and we were actually engaged and going to get married.
We had planned a wedding sort of and it was very poorly planned but some of my friends were going to be there and I do remember the setting of it all being pretty average and not the worst.
I remember my dress, we didn’t actually buy one. I have a white fancy dress stashed away in my closet that my aunt gave me (true story) so we used that. And the cake, well…. I didn’t like it all.
The craziest part though, was that I went through the wedding by myself. I got married and no one was there. I looked to my left and said “I do” to the air and no one even noticed it, so in my dream I said “fuck this do over” and my dream literally re-winded and went to the start of the wedding. And I did that maybe 3 times.
The sad part, wasn’t that I started over so many times waiting for my soon-to-be-husband, I started over because I didn’t like the cake. Every time people kept grabbing it with their hands and whoever was cutting it wasn’t cutting it good enough. it was a poor excuse for a cake, and I’m sure my culinary teacher would be proud of me for my dream-me knowing what a real cake should look like.
So I started over the last time and for some reason it went back farther. To the point where I was getting dropped off by my soon to be husband’s parents at the changing room to change into my dress. I remember walking into like a lockerish, bathroomish, gym stylish room. I had to pee so I went to the stall in the back but someone was in there. So for some reason I freaked out and tried to hide by this white bench. She saw me and unfortunately she was the wedding planner.
I was freaking out because by this time I think in-dream-me realized that I was only 20 and didn’t want to get married. And then my fiance’s sisters walked in.
They were telling me “come on, hurry up” and I was so confused.
Like I said I was so freaked out, I was acting like they were going to murder me so I ran out the building. For some reason unknown to me, Zooey Deschanel shows up like my brides maid or my best friend or something and helps me run. Now for another reason unknown to me, my wedding was famous or publicly known because the paparazzi said “there’s the bride! Follow her!”
And they chased after us. Zooey and I ran to some weird building at what seemed like lightning speed. We got in, and locked the doors because not too far behind us were these crazy photographers and crazy reporters.
Inside, was a room full of weird protesting people. They were what seemed like lawyers protesting people. Now that I am remembering this with my own common sense I can not find a reason why I needed a lawyer to get out of the marriage I didn’t even say “I do” to yet. But for some reason Zooey and I begged all the lawyers to help. But even after all the pleading no one wanted to help. So I told them about my “relationship” with the soon to be husband and one woman got up and volunteered herself. With my team consisting of a runaway bride, a celebrity, and a lawyer, we ran outside the backdoor and arrived at the wedding hall.
This is where it gets kind of blurry. I don’t exactly remember if I waited till the very last second when I was at the alter, or If I said something before that could happen in a private room. I think it was the private room.. But I do remember what I said.
Soon to be husband was in the room, staring at my face, I was in my lame wedding gown, he in his tux, and with a lawyer on one side of me and Zooey on the other I told him something along the lines of:
I can’t marry you. None of my friends are here, the cake is too small, and my dress sucks. And then dream-me started to remember real me and dream-me began to say, I can’t marry you, I’m only 20 and I have a lot ahead of me, and besides that I can’t marry you, I’m in love with him! And right then and there kevin showed up in his cool car (dream kevin has a much cooler car than in real life kevin) I jumped in and left.
Now I warned you all that this was going to be weird. And that was absolutely what I promised.
I usually don’t have dreams about that guy but when I do they’re usually weird as all hell, probably even weirder than this one.